Podcast: Handling Everyday Verbal Abuse God’s Way

You might never experience physical abuse, but there is no escaping verbal abuse unless you live as a hermit away from all humans. Verbal abuse is commonplace today if you work at an office, are active on social media like Facebook (or have a post-trib rapture teaching website..) or if you belong to a church where gossip is the norm. Heck, if you have friends or family you will have verbal abuse. So, how do you handle these assaults God's way? How do you not respond in kind with those juicy retorts you think up? Tim and Katrina discuss strategies and key verses to overcome in this overlooked but crucial aspect so you can have "maturity" in the faith according to Jesus' brother, James (Jas 3:2). (You are tired of being an immature believer, right?)

Outline of topics covered:

  • 1:00 — Stuck with gossipers in your life?
  • 2:18 — No. 1 problem we deal with in community with others and its aspects is Verbal Abuse.
  • 3:27 — Tim reads an email response to our last Supporter Fellowship talking about verbal abuse.
  • 4:15 — Bible prophecy teachers (like Tim) get verbal and written abuse, too. They can relate to you!
  • 5:27 — Social media gives space for even more verbal abuse and gossip about you. Those anonymous, pesky comments!
  • 6:47 — Why explaining yourself often does not work.
  • 7:57 — It's scary being out of control and having safety issues.
  • 10:30 — Katrina's testimony of verbal abuse in school, every student's nightmare.
  • 13:13 — Reading whole books of the Bible to get balanced understanding. Take the time.
  • 13:46 — James, Jesus' brother critical warning about our tongue and self-control.
  • 14:42 — What does a mature man require according to James? (Do you have some growing up to do?)
  • 16:24 — It feels good to gossip and/or talk back to people.- come on, admit it!
  • 17:19 — Respect that every human holds God's likeness. Wow, what an honor we hold!
  • 18:17 — Feeling guilty about hurting others with our tongue but not having the tools to do differently.
  • 19:25 — Tim's strategy: "If it feels good then don't say it!"- repeat, repeat, repeat.
  • 20:10 — "Wise and understanding person" defined and how to get there. We are all supposed to become wise
    and understanding. (yeah, you too 🙂
  • 21:23 — What keeps us from being wise and understanding? Shared.
  • 23:00 — What we all do that James called "demonic?" Yeah...probably a good place to evaluate and eradicate
    those actions and things in your life.
  • 23:50 — It's a blessing to be in verbally abusive situations. (Wait...What?!)
  • 25:00 — Our #1 goal according to James
  • 26:19 — How Jesus leads us into patience, endurance, and ultimately peace by His example in the midst of
    suffering. (I know...you don't like being told peace comes through suffering- Yeah, I know you want to
    throw rotten tomatoes at us now :).
  • 28:00 — Suffering is good for you (again down with the rotten tomatoes :).
  • 28:30 — Why, why, why? Why do it God's way when doing it other ways feels soooo good? You MUST
    become clear on why you choose to do things God's way. What is the end goal? a) What does Galatians 5:19 have to do with the end goal?
  • 28:54 — Are you the type of person that you or I want to be hanging out with for eternity? Are we the type of
    people that you want to be hanging out with for eternity? (Don't answer those questions too quickly now.)
  • 30:20 — Being different than the world (are you different or becoming different?)
  • 31:30 — What is obedience to Christ?
  • 31:40 — Are you too "lazy to understand" as James said? How did you get there if you are? Are you still only getting some nourishment from spiritual milk? How do you grow up to handle spiritual meat? What is spiritual
  • 32:49 — If you cannot discern between good and evil (lots of questions on how to handle life situations that
    don't seem to get answered for ya), slow down. You might be moving to fast.
  • 35:39 — If people who were taught by the Apostles had problems in maturing, then probably we are going to
    as well since we don't have Apostles usually living in our midst teaching us. Don't guilt yourself but instead focus on change.
  • 37:10 — Are you "living like an Unbeliever?" (Hey, not our words. It's Paul's words. You can put down your
    stones now :).
  • 37:23 — First filter and actions to take before responding to verbal abuse according to Scripture.
  • 39:25 — Who is defending who? What does Moses' life show us?
  • 41:39 — "Bless those who curse us" and intercede for them- oh yeah, that is gonna hurt to do. Are you willing
    to lose your life to find life?
  • 43:00 — Bonus given (in Support Fellowship) that is now given to you- The Spiritual Bazooka to bring in to
    the battle. The fast track to getting through verbal abuse issues.
  • 47:49 — And another bonus on how to handle verbal abuse just for you- You're welcome 🙂
  • 49:49 — Wow, talk about generous. We even give one more bonus for our 25th anniversary- Our testimony on how Katrina was out of line and out of respect of Tim for a good part of our marriage, and how God changed her FINALLY. (Katrina wrote that. Are you guilty of giving verbal abuse, not just receiving it?)
  • 54:37 — You are all called to do "The Work of God." Do you know what that work is? (Hint, it's not what you think.)

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Cinnamon Dixon - January 30, 2018

This podcast was exactly what I needed to hear. Jeshua has been putting it on my heart for the last 6 months or so to love others when they are unlovable, namely my husband. Also, I got a gentle reprimand to let my husband be where he was at. I might not like some of his actions and behaviors but it wasn’t my job to correct him or try to turn him back to Jeshua. I had to let God be God. My job is to show him Christ’s love through my behaviors.

This can be sooo hard to do. The world says I deserve better treatment and to leave my marriage. Or at the very least to argue back and defend myself. It’s is so hard in that red hot moment to keep my mouth shut and not say anything. I know i should pray for the right thought or action. Sometimes I succeed, many times I fail. Often in that red hot moment of anger or hurt I know I should pray but I just don’t want to. The situation always escalates until I finally relent and pray for God to show me the way of Christ the peacemaker.

I was so happy to listen to your podcast today. I was taking notes and will listen to it again. It was nice to know im not ‘taking this whole Jesus/loving thing too far.’ I also appreciate your honesty. It helps knowing I’m not the only one that needs lots of practice.

    Christopher Dawson - September 3, 2020

    Bless you Cinnamon! The same thing from Jeshua putting this on my heart has been happening to me after praying a lot to show me wisdom in this area as my wife and I have been arguing a lot off and on for a while now. I have been trying to control my tongue more in these situations and be more positive towards her but what Katrina said in the Podcast about how she was being judgemental towards Tim in her head really hit home with me and as you say was exactly what I needed to hear and was a HUGE realisation breakthrough for me into what to work on in our relationship and to leave my wife to her stuff and to concentrate on controlling myself and not her which was selfish and I didn’t even realise. As you say it is very hard to do and I also fail a lot but I am improving and was really pleased to listen to this Podcast and I will also listen again to it for sure and you are definitely not the only one who needs practice at this. Thankyou for sharing and Thankyou to Tim and Katrina’s amazing teaching!

sarah orchard - December 17, 2017

Thank you both so much,

I am so blessed by this. I was looking for some comfort today due to numerous situations in different areas of my life and feeling overwhelmed, alone and actually weighted down. Physically still feel the weight but totally spiritually uplifted by your encouraging podcast focusing on an uncomfortable issue that we all need to hear. Will be listening again soon incase I missed anything.

Can’t wait for the book either!

Sue W - December 4, 2017

Thank you for sharing, Tim and Katrina.

Your podcasts are instructive, encouraging, and thought provoking. I love your reassurance that our baby steps towards being the kind of people with whom God wants to spend eternity are valued by Him. That helps set us up for success.

Blessings to all.

Lori - December 3, 2017

Dear Tim and Katrina,

Once again, thank you both for your transparency and real life examples! I’ve never found it very useful to hear only the words of what we are to do without the fleshing out of how to do it! God bless you both with continued wisdom, humility, love and courage to be the teacher’s of Yehova’s way that He has clearly called you into by walking the talk!

Humbled by the goodness and grace of my Heavenly Father, Jehovah,

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